Another reason not to exercise

At the gym last weekend, I did my usual half-hour on the treadmill, and then headed into the weight room. I find weight machines confusing enough when I’m at my most clear-headed (How do I use this? Do I even want to? Does this particular push-and-pull device bulk up muscles that I give the slightest shit about? Meanwhile, buffed-out sweaty people are striding purposefully and decisively from machine to machine, and I’m afraid of getting in their way) but I’d been especially brutal on myself during my cardio, and I was completely dazed. I have a couple of sunshine-and-swimming vacations coming up, and I’ve got to sexify myself before bathing suit time.

So I was kind of confusedly ambling around the room with my towel and water bottle in one hand and my iPod in the other, briefly pausing at various stations, trying to focus enough to figure out what to do next. It was all beyond me. Then I spotted a guy in the corner doing push-ups. Push-ups I could handle. I know how a push-up works, and I know what purpose it serves. Push-ups are for me.

I laid out my towel so my hands wouldn’t have to touch the potentially disgusting gym floor. I attempted a sip of water but, in my weakened state, managed to dump it all over my face. I set down my iPod…which was when I noticed that all I was holding at this point was a pair of headphones connected to nothing. Somehow, in my dumb fog, I’d managed to not notice dropping my iPod. I retraced my steps from one end of the weight room to the other, and then back to the treadmill area. I got on my hands and knees and looked under every machine in the place. Nothing. I asked at the front desk if it had been turned in. An hour later, I asked again.

No dice. iPod gone.

I probably shouldn’t be as irritated as I am. It’s just a thing. A replaceable thing. I’ve still got all of the music (and the audiobook) that it contained either on my computer or on CD, and I’ve been half-looking for an excuse to buy an iPhone anyway. But I am irritated. The thing didn’t evaporate. Someone picked it up. The gym that I go to is not cheap (I get a discount through my work, and I still pay out the nose). Anyone there can afford a much better iPod than mine (which I got, what, four years ago? And it was junky then) without flinching at the cost. So why take it? Did they want to check out my taste in music? Because they’re not going to like it. If the whiny early 90s pop punk doesn’t turn them off, the Scandinavian black metal surely will.